Paul in his letter to the Ephesians states that marriage is the mysterious transformation of two individuals into one new flesh. The image of God was first placed in Adam, both male and female. Then Eve was removed from Adam. Now in marriage Adam and Eve are essentially reconnected as one new identity. Paul goes on to say that this new relationship is similar to that of Christ and the Church. Just as we are encouraged to put on the ‘new man’ of this new relationship with God (Ephesians 4:24), we should also put on the new man of this new relationship with our spouse in marriage (Ephesians 5:31).
Paul, they say, knew marriage on a spiritual level but Peter actually lived with a woman. There is a difference. Peter tells us to live together in understanding and honor. They are both correct. Marriage is both a deep spiritual mystery and a simple relationship between two people (one male and one female), choosing to live in a lifelong loving, trusting, and faithful connection before God. Get these scriptures into your heart, they will reinforce the mystery and enhance the journey.
“Enjoy life with the wife whom you love”
Then God said, ”Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. And God blessed them. And God said to them, ”Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” Genesis 1:26-28
Then the LORD God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” Genesis 2:18
“When a man is newly married, he shall not go out with the army or be liable for any other public duty. He shall be free at home one year to be happy with his wife whom he has taken…” Deuteronomy 24:5
House and wealth are inherited from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the LORD. Proverbs 19:14
Do not say, “I will do to him as he has done to me; I will pay the man back for what he has done.” Proverbs 24:29
Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Enjoy life with the wife whom you love, all the days of your vain life that he has given you under the sun, because that is your portion in life and in your toil at which you toil under the sun. Ecclesiastes 9:9 ESV
And I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy. Hosea 2:19
But you say, “Why does he not?” Because the LORD was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one Godseeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth. Malachi 2:14-15
“ … ’Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” Matthew 19:5-6
“…What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” Mark 10:9
Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. Romans 12:17
Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails; but if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge, it will be done away. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. Ephesians 4:1-3
Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:31-32
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her; that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she should be holy and blameless. So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, Ephesians 5:25-29
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. Ephesians 5:31-32
complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Philippians 2:2
And it is my prayer that your love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment, so that you may approve what is excellent, and so be pure and blameless for the day of Christ Philippians 1:9-10
Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. Colossians 3:12-14
Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. Hebrews 13:4
Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart. 1 Peter 1:22
In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. And let not your adornment be merely external– braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands. Thus Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. 1 Peter 3:1-6
Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered 1 Peter 3:7
Comments
I was divorced a few weeks ago. Since then I have started reading the bible and praying and looking for anything I can find to restore my marriage. I did not ask for the divorce and to this day I believe and feel that we are suppose to be together. That God made us for each other. I told God that I would stand still and let him do what he needs to to bring us back together. I ask God if he is going to bring my wife (Amanda) back home to us me and our children and I hear the word yes. I believe it’s him telling me this and it’s not just me convincing myself cause I want her back. I know she is still in love with and wants to come back cause of the things she dose and says but she keeps fighting her true feeling. A couple of days age she come over and we spent time just talking and the following we spent the day together she even put her head on my shoulder for a while. She said that she wants her own identity and wants to have her own life. Every fiber in my heart tells different. She has admitted that she is fighting her feelings.
I need your help and prayers. I know God is working on this cause he keeps telling not to give up I just hope that it really is him and not just me. I still have a lot to learn when it comes to knowing God but I do believe in him I always have I was just never committed like I have become here lately. I love my wife with all my heart. I still call her my wife cause I believe in our marriage and believe that we will be there again. I have come to believe that we are where we are today because we didn’t have God in our life we were more worried about everything else and ever made time for him.
I guess what I’m asking is for help to understand if the yes word I hear in my head is God or if it’s just me and why she keeps fighting her true feeling that I know are there.
Can you please pray for us and help with my understanding.
May your wife see the err in her ways and may your marriage be saved. In Jesus name I pray, Amen!
I am man who have been encouraged by scripture, to live right with God through married. Few days later to arranged with my family ,unfortunately my partner brings up serious confusion in the family which I about to makes an arrangements with . because of this act I am so embarrassed with such behaviour. What should I do in such a conditions, what should be my prayers point right now ?
I prayer for marriages that are broken to he healed,may heaven smile upon you today,and may God give you the strength to do what is necessary to save your marriages,may love flow through your hearts,and may you be sensitive and committed to each others needs in Jesus name.
Hello all my make is Francisco and I have been married for 20 years this December will be 21 years. I have not been to church regularly in about 4 years and I see what the enemy has done to my marriage and my home and children, I was drinking and just endulging in worldly pleasures being a selfish married man my wife slowly started not making me dinner then no dinner then she stopped other things as well intimacy and so on and I just didn’t think nothing of it and now she wants to quit and I told her I will leave the worldly life and lets go back to our first love and foundation Jesus Christ. I said Vanguard will start mending our hearts and mending us but it’s now getting to the point to where any little thing I tell her she gets angry and she wants to pick five she’s quiet she sleeps in another room and I just tears me apart to know that we’re going through this because I want her to be happy and loving like we used to be I’m just asking for prayer for me not to accuse of her of having another man or anything like that but to have strength and Love for my marriage and for my house for God to give me the strength and the authority to move forward so that my wife will start having a heart to love me and me for her but makeing sure that God is our foundation first .thank you all the God bless you..
Pls I want to be guided on how to pray rightly because I met this guy,and he wants to marry me,but we need approval from God b4 we go on. How do we pray towards it? Tnx
Precious – You go slow and seek God. Listen honestly to what your heart says by way of the Holy Spirit. Do NOT listen to your emotions, they can lie to you. Look at the facts – will you become closer to God with this man or will you have to pull him up to your level. Assume that he will not change, because he probably won’t. Be critical now because everything looks good now. In marriage, the good things become better and the bad things become much worse – and more visible.
Seek God and be WILLING to give him up if God leads you in that direction. The willing part is crucial to correctly hearing from God, in anything. Otherwise, you will talk yourself into it. We love you. God bless and obey God. Rex
Thank you for this great post. I especially like Ecclesiastes 4:9-12. I don’t have any infidelity in my marriage and I am very thankful to God that I do not have to deal with that. My prayers go out to those that have to deal with cheaters. I am married to a Christian man. He is a nice enough person to every one else but lately I have realized that we have a pretty miserable marriage. Our children are grown and out of the house. Now that we are alone together, I found out that we really don’t get along very well. Has anyone else experienced this? We are both Christians, we go to church, but he is more involved in the church than I am because he has more time than I do to spend time there. I have a very demanding job that takes up a lot of my time. He is nice to the people at church but he acts cold and angry at home. I know there is something wrong but I don’t know what it is. If I try to talk to him about it he says I am attacking him. We went to see a counselor years ago for the same sort of stuff but I thought it was behind us. I am not going into a lot of detail but this situation is pretty bad and it is wearing me out. All I can do is pray and ask God to show up and fix this mess but for now I don’t see Him here. Maybe I am just unloading here. At church it seems like I can’t talk about this stuff because people only want to hear a good report if you know what I mean. People at work aren’t really Christians and they don’t understand except to advise leaving him which is not an option. I have taken the time to talk with my pastor about this with my husband but my husband only hears what I need to change. Maybe God will show up here with some answers. It can’t hurt I guess.
I am asking that my marriage of six years does not end. I am asking that God being who He say He is will restore, return resurrect and rebuild what I have lost due to my fear and not trusting the woman He blessed me with. I allowed my past marriage of infidelity affect my current marriage. I know I should have been more trusting of her as my wife. She is all that I asked for and I am not trying to loose her or our family! Please place us in your prayer circle! Thank you and may God bless all marriages that are going through their wars and may He bring them out unified and stronger than before!
Praise be to GOD! I am in prayer but need prayer warriors help! My husband left me pregnant with 3 children back in Dec. 2013. He has started proceedings for a divorce, which I am not wanting at all. He in turn has been enjoying his new “single” status and still contacting alot of women. He wants me and himself to go back to “dating”,so that we can get married again but not with the marraige license! I want to stick by my husband no matter what because we are in a marraige covenient and GOD hates divorce and I feel that he is not honoring our vows that we took before GOD of for better or worse. Please help me pray because the devil is busy because everytime we seem to get along I find out about him contacting another woman and I’m heartbroken again. I want GOD’s will to be done! For it say’s in the Bible “What GOD joins together, let no Man seperate! Praise be to GOD! In JESUS name I pray! AMEN!
L’Oriel – I am praying for you to hear the voice of God. Be open to His leading. What your husband is doing is not right and it goes against the Bible standard on marriage. Yes, God hates divorce but he also hates you going through this.
And yes, the Bible says, “Let no man separate,” but God can separate it, based on what He says in His word. Listen to Him and not your own viewpoint. The covenant has been broken, now what does God want you to do from this point on?! I believe you will hear in Jesus Name.
Oh, L’Oriel, I cannot read your post with out responding to you. I am praying for reconciliation,How are things going, God bless you….
L’Oriel, God doesn’t separate. You are right in thinking that it’s God’s will for you and your husband to stay married. Keep your eyes on Jesus. Keep confessing The Word over your husband and children. God is bigger! Love never fails!
Just a thought…what if God separated from us every time we “cheated” on Him with someone or something else? How many times daily do we do something that displeases Him? Yet He loves us so much He gave us Jesus. When we ask for forgiveness, He forgives and forgets. He doesn’t keep a record of it. If we want to be forgiven we must forgive. No, it isn’t easy, but with God ALL things are possible. Praise The Lord!
Sorry but this is religious baloney. Sure, every time we make a mistake God does not cut us off. However, this is not anything like that. He has consciously and continually disregarded the marriage covenant and gone after other women. L’Oriel, you are no longer bound. Yes, God loves everybody but some unfortunately will go to Hell. It is the hard truth. God hates divorce just like He hates Hell, but there comes a time when it has to happen.
When we ‘cheat’ on God the relationship remains but the fellowship is broken, but I believe if the cheating continues, at a certain point the relationship can also end (Hebrews 6). This has nothing to do with forgiveness. This is all about trust and faithfulness. He has broken the covenant through continued persistent adultery. He has chosen not to live with you in a proper holy marriage. He went out dating when you were pregnant and with 3 kids!! The Bible is clear. Now, he wants to have his cake and eat it too! What is up about that?!
So Stephanie, you are saying that L’Oriel (pregnant & with 3 kids) is supposed to ignore and ‘forgive’ this man and keep herself and her children in this abusive unclean environment. And she is not supposed to ‘keep a record’ of the other women?! Terrible.
Pray for him, confess the word over him, but unless he changes and until he changes, get out and stay out. Get help and get healthy. You owe it to your children.
I must say I agree. God hates divorce, but He divorced Israel, did He not? When one spouse is playing the whore, it is the right of the other spouse to put them away.
Jeremiah 3:8 KJV And I saw, when for all the causes whereby backsliding Israel committed adultery I had put her away, and given her a bill of divorce; yet her treacherous sister Judah feared not, but went and played the harlot also.
I have been separated from my husband for almost 3 months. I love him and want our marriage to be a godly marriage according to the word. Pray for us and I’ll keep these scriptures handy.
Please pray that my marriage is healed and that my separation ends. I love and need my husband. There is no abuse or infidelity involved. Just life, stress, finances got in the way. I know God hates divorce and hates when a man covers himself with such violence.
I am standing for my marriage in prayer each day and it is hard because some people say move on and be single and footloose and fancy free. I want my family back. I want my husband and it is so painful living without him each day.
Please pray for us and THANK YOU for the scriptures.
Rick – Thank you. It surely takes both Husband and Wife, with God’s help to make it work. All the inertia of the world is against it. That alone should tell us that it is of God and should be fought for aggressively. God bless, Rex.